UtterStuff

1. have a guilty attorney as a pro bono client

2. drop your car keys in the port-o-let

3. live in a country run by a dick in a bush

4. find out your beloved has eaten the entire bag of special cookies you’ve been saving for your birthday breakfast

5. a cookie fart

6. getting roped into moving a piano by a neighbor who can only play Methodist hymns

7. after circling the airport for an hour, the FAA reroutes you to Murfreesboro

8. being caned in singapore for rude comportment flagrantly exhibited before significant brave government leaders

9. all of a sudden, without any advance warning whatsoever, there really is a god

10. you have to write an uplifting national anthem for one of the breakway territories in the Pakistan-Afghanistan border region

11. discover adorable little pluto isn’t a real planet -- after all that

12. lose your water payment receipt voucher complaint number at the city hall water supply bureau frequent complaint department appointment desk

13. your eyeglasses spawn a virulent mind-shrinking microbe

14. your supervisor's boss's kid's name isn’t even close to pronounce-ability

15. start another how to harsh a mellow list