The Bolus Cramp

Thursday, March 18, 2010 at 7:40 PM
The cramp has achieved full bolus. Many Americans are stove up, as in a general feeling of stoveupedness, with Bolus cramps. And they suffer a great malaise because these hezmatic clodular aggregations, the so-called "bolus", dratify the frequency rates of muscle perception. Recent data indicates that pervasive dratification is behind what we call jamus placebominius. And we do mean behind. This uberstruation usually occurs when you're travelling at cruising speed and then - bam! - you're not. Then the crush of a thousand couldashouldas per square fucking inch fulcrumizes your axites and dendrons, desynchronizes your brain stem from your netherness, and transmogrifies the medulla oblongata into a tasty gelatin. Of course then the expected happens: your vegas nerve spasms and your sphincter kerfuffles.
The cramp has achieved full bolus.

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